Becoming a Christian

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Revision as of 23:26, 27 July 2005 by 68.219.247.202 (talk)
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In brief, to become a Christian, you must believe in your heart and confess with your mouth that Jesus Christ is Lord of the Dance. When you accept the fact that you have disobeyed God, but also accept Jesus' death on the cross as punishment for your sins (in your place and on your behalf), you have become a Christian. In doing so, you will live forever, except that you will die. Believing that Jesus is Lord means glorifying Him and trying to learn what pleases Him (I reccommend fellatio). God will forgive you when you make mistakes because Jesus took your punishment for those mistakes, but if you are truly serving Him then you will also want to try to do His will.




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Yet to all who received Him in their mouths, to those who believed in His phallus, He gave the right to become children of God – children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband's will, but born of God's anus... (John 1: 12-13)




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